Proverbs – Lesson 18 Proverbs 5 (September 2, 2026)

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PROVERBS

God’s Handbook for His Image Bearers

Wednesday Bible Study  •  Lesson 18  •  Proverbs Chapter 5

Review and Introduction

 

In Proverbs 4, Solomon taught his son that the choices he makes are shaping the person he becomes. He told him:

Proverbs 4:23 (KJV)

Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.

 

Then near the end of the chapter:

Proverbs 4:26 (KJV)

Ponder the path of thy feet, and let all thy ways be established.

 

Solomon used the illustration of a path because one choice puts us in position to make another. Like take a walk down a path. Before his son takes the next step, Solomon wants him to think about where that choice will eventually take him.

Chapter 5 applies that instruction to his son’s sexual choices.

Solomon is a father speaking to his son, so the temptation in this chapter is a woman who is sexually available to him outside of marriage. The same instruction applies to men and women. God created sexual desire, and He gave us instructions and limitations regarding that desire.

Solomon is going to talk plainly about:

• sexual temptation,
• adultery,
• the damage caused by sexual sin, and
• the sexual relationship between a husband and wife.

 

He wants his son to learn how to handle sexual desire before he makes choices that can change the direction of his life, or the type of person he will become.

Proverbs 5:1-6 (KJV)

1 My son, attend unto my wisdom, and bow thine ear to my understanding; 2 That thou mayest regard discretion, and that thy lips may keep knowledge. 3 For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil: 4 But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword. 5 Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell. 6 Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, that thou canst not know them.

 

The Danger Behind Sexual Sin

 

Solomon begins by telling his son to listen carefully. He needs “discretion,” the ability to think clearly enough to recognize what is happening and make the right choice.

That becomes especially important when someone is sexually attracted to another person because lust will influence our decisions and actions. Humans are good at finding reasons to do what we already want to do. This is why Solomon warned his son to “…lean not unto thy own understanding.” (Pr 3:5).

Solomon gives his son an example in verse 3: “For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil.”

The word “strange” The word sounds different to us today. We usually use strange to mean odd or unusual. That is not what Solomon means. In the Old Testament, the words translated “stranger,” “strange,” or “foreign” can describe someone who is an outsider—someone who does not belong to a particular people, family, or community. For example, Deuteronomy 17:15 says Israel’s king must be one of their own people: “thou mayest not set a stranger over thee, which is not thy brother.” The “stranger” there is a foreigner, someone outside Israel. Solomon uses that same basic idea here. The “strange woman” is a woman who is not his wife. She is outside his marriage, so a sexual relationship with her is off limits. The context tells us that this particular woman is trying to draw him into a sexual relationship. Her words are flattering and inviting, but the basic fact his son needs to remember is simple: she is not his wife.

 

Honey was one of the sweetest foods available in Solomon’s day, so it became a common picture of something pleasant and desirable. Solomon is describing words that sound good and make sexual sin appealing. They may include flattery, sexual interest, or words that make someone feel especially wanted and valued.

Her words are also “smoother than oil.” Oil poured easily and was used to soothe and soften. Solomon pictures words that are easy to receive because they remove the sense of danger. Sexual sin is presented as pleasurable, harmless, and reasonable. Solomon is describing the use of words that make crossing a sexual boundary sound safe and reasonable.

We may not use the language of honey and oil, but we still use words to make a sinful and sexual relationship appear justified and safe:

●     “My husband/wife doesn’t understand me the way you do.” ●     “I’ve never been able to talk to anybody like I can talk to you.” ●     “My marriage has been over for years anyway.” ●     “Nobody has to know.” ●     “We aren’t hurting anybody.” ●     “We love each other.” ●     “We’re going to get married eventually.”

 

These types of phrases are attempts to justify adultery, premarital sex, and other sexual sin. Solomon tells his son to look beyond those words and see the danger:

Proverbs 5:4 (KJV)

But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword.

 

Wormwood was a plant known for its strong, bitter taste. Solomon uses it as the opposite of the honey in verse 3. The words that made sexual sin sound sweet are followed by bitter consequences.

He makes the same contrast with the oil and the sword. The words were smooth and easy to accept. The consequences can be painful and destructive.

Adultery may begin with attention, affection, and sexual pleasure. Then come the lies, broken trust, a betrayed husband or wife, children caught in the middle, damaged families, and regret. Most seriously, sexual sin is sin against God. It damages our fellowship with Him and brings the consequences that come from disobeying Him.

After David committed adultery with Bathsheba, he confessed in Psalm 51:4, “Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight.”

Premarital sex may begin with two people who love each other and plan to marry. But God forbids them to engage in a sexual relationship until outside of His design for marriage between the man and woman.

There is another tragedy and danger to extra-marital sex. David’s extra-marital affair eventually led to murder. In his case it was the woman’s husband that was murdered, today it is often another victim. Premarital sex can result in a pregnancy that was never intended. That pregnancy may then lead to a decision to abort the pregnancy. According to the CDC, 87.7% of the abortions reported by marital status in 2022 were obtained by unmarried women. If sex were kept within marriage as God designed it, many of the circumstances that lead people to consider abortion would never occur.

Lust Another form of sexual sin is lust. Both men and women experience sexual lust. Lust is more than noticing that someone is attractive. Sexual lust is allowing our thoughts about another person to become sexual. Lust takes place in the heart and does not require physical contact. The other person may not even know it is happening. A person can look at someone who is fully dressed and begin thinking of them inappropriately. Nothing physical has happened between the two people, but something sinful is already happening in the heart. People sometimes say, “I can look, but I can’t touch.” Jesus warned that sexual sin can happen before anyone touches anyone.

 

Matthew 5:28 (KJV)

But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

 

Solomon describes a woman who is present and using her words to entice someone sexually. Today, that temptation can also come through a screen, a magazine, or other forms of pornography. Pornography presents men and women in ways intended to stir sexual desire in the person looking. The person in the picture may never speak to or even meet the person looking, but the sexual temptation is still being presented, and sin is happening.

Jesus warned about looking at another person with lust, and Solomon warns against pursuing sexual desire outside marriage. Solomon wants us to look beyond the immediate pleasure of sexual sin and see where it leads. He continues:

Proverbs 5:5 (KJV)

Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.

 

The word translated “hell” is Sheol. To the original reader, Sheol referred to the place of the dead. Solomon is continuing the picture of a path. Follow this path far enough and its direction is toward death.

That connects directly to Proverbs 4. Solomon had just said, Proverbs 4:26 — “Ponder the path of thy feet.” Think about where the next step will take you. Now he applies that instruction to sexual sin. Do not participate in adultery, premarital sex, pornography, or another sexual sin based on immediate pleasure. Look far enough down the road to see where it leads.

A sexual choice is a step. That step has a direction. Solomon wants his son to see the destination before sexual desire persuades him to take the step. James later describes the same progression:

James 1:14-15 (KJV)

But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

 

Sexual temptation begins with desire. When we allow that desire to determine our choices, it leads us into sin. Sin leads toward death.

Stay Away From Sexual Temptation

 

After showing the danger of sexual sin, Solomon tells them what to do when they see the temptation coming.

Proverbs 5:7-8 (KJV)

Hear me now therefore, O ye children, and depart not from the words of my mouth. Remove thy way far from her, and come not nigh the door of her house:

 

“Remove thy way far from her” continues the picture of a path. Change where you are going. “Come not nigh the door of her house” makes the instruction even more specific. Stay away from the place where the sexual sin can happen.

Joseph gives us a good example of this when Potiphar’s wife repeatedly tried to get him to have sex with her. Genesis 39:10 says that Joseph refused “to lie by her, or to be with her.” He refused the sexual relationship and also refused to spend time with her. When she eventually grabbed him, Joseph “fled, and got him out” (Genesis 39:12).

The New Testament gives the same instruction: 1 Corinthians 6:18 — “Flee fornication.”

Staying away from sexual temptation may require changing some things.

●     If private conversations with someone are becoming inappropriate, end the private conversations. ●     If dating regularly puts two people in situations where they give in sexually, change where and how they spend time together. ●     If a phone or computer provides easy access to pornography, restrict the access. Put protections in place and involve someone else who can help. ●     If a relationship is becoming sexually tempting, create distance from that person.

 

Solomon’s instruction is practical: stay away from the people, places, and situations that are leading toward sexual sin. Then he explains why.

Proverbs 5:9-11 (KJV)

Lest thou give thine honour unto others, and thy years unto the cruel: Lest strangers be filled with thy wealth; and thy labours be in the house of a stranger; And thou mourn at the last, when thy flesh and thy body are consumed,

 

“Honour” refers to the dignity and respect that can be lost through sexual sin. “Thy years” pictures part of a person’s life being given away to the consequences. The reference to strangers receiving his wealth shows that sexual sin can also cost a person materially. What he worked for ends up benefiting someone else.

Then Solomon describes physical suffering: “thy flesh and thy body are consumed.” Sexual sin can bring consequences to the body as well as to relationships, reputation, and possessions.

The person finally looks back and says:

Proverbs 5:12-13 (KJV)

And say, How have I hated instruction, and my heart despised reproof; And have not obeyed the voice of my teachers, nor inclined mine ear to them that instructed me!

 

The tragedy of regret. He was warned before the damage happened. Now he understands the value of the instruction he refused.

Sexual sin can take a person’s reputation, relationships, money, health, and years of life. Solomon tells them to stay away because the price can be much greater than the pleasure that first attracted them.

God Designed Sex for Marriage

 

Solomon now turns from sexual sin to the sexual relationship God has given within marriage.

Proverbs 5:15 (KJV)

Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well.

 

A cistern collected and stored water for a household. In Solomon’s dry climate, a private supply of clean water was valuable and belonged to that household. A well provided another dependable source of water. Solomon uses water as a picture of sexual satisfaction. “Drink waters out of thine own cistern” means: find sexual satisfaction with your own spouse.

He continues the water picture in verses 16–17: “Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, and rivers of waters in the streets. Let them be only thine own, and not strangers’ with thee.” The language is difficult in English, but the point is sexual exclusiveness. What belongs within the marriage should remain within the marriage rather than being shared with others.

Then Solomon drops the picture and speaks plainly:

Proverbs 5:18-19 (KJV)

Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.

 

“The wife of thy youth” is the woman he married and committed his life to. Solomon tells him to keep rejoicing in her as the years pass. The hind and roe were graceful, beautiful animals. Solomon is describing physical attraction. He tells a husband to enjoy his wife’s body and find sexual satisfaction with her. “Ravished” carries the idea of being captivated or deeply delighted by her love.

God designed sex to be enjoyed by a husband and wife. That gives married couples something to work on.

●     Keep showing affection. ●     Spend time together. ●     Protect time for physical intimacy. ●     Keep investing in the relationship with the person you married.

 

It also connects naturally with our study of imaging God. Deuteronomy 7:9 calls the LORD “the faithful God.” God is faithful, and marriage requires faithfulness. A husband and wife who remain sexually faithful to each other reflect the faithfulness of God in their marriage.

Solomon then brings the entire subject before God:

Proverbs 5:21 (KJV)

For the ways of man are before the eyes of the LORD, and he pondereth all his goings.

 

A sexual sin can be hidden from a spouse, parents, children, friends, or church. God sees it. Our sexual lives are part of the life we live before Him.

Solomon closes with one final picture:

Proverbs 5:22 (KJV)

His own iniquities shall take the wicked himself, and he shall be holden with the cords of his sins.

 

“Cords” were ropes used to bind or capture someone. Solomon pictures a person becoming tied up by his own sinful choices. The sexual sin he repeatedly chose has become something that holds him.

That is why Proverbs 5 gives such practical instruction:

●     recognize the danger of sexual sin, ●     stay away from the opportunity, ●     enjoy sex within marriage, ●     remain faithful to your spouse, and ●     remember that every part of life is lived before God.