Living With God & Grief – Lesson 2 – Identifying Losess that Lead to Grief – February 22, 2026

Life With God & Grief

Lesson 2 – Identifying Losses that Lead to Grief

February 22, 2026

Introduction:

This series is called Life With God and Grief because life is lived with both. God and grief are not an either-or reality. Grief does not mean God is absent, and God’s presence does not remove the reality of grief.

Key Verse:

“The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the LORD delivereth him out of them all.” (Psalm 34:18–19)

We will continue using the working definition of grief established in Lesson 1:  Grief is the internal response to loss—what happens inside a person when something meaningful is changed, taken away, or never comes to be. Although grief begins internally, it shows up outwardly and affects every area of life.

In our first lesson, we focused on defining grief and identifying how it shows up in our lives, even when we are functioning and moving forward. Today, we are taking the next step by looking at where grief comes from.

Grief always begins with loss. When something meaningful is changed, taken away, or never comes to be, grief follows. Some losses are obvious and public. Others are quiet, private, or misunderstood. In every case, the grief is real, and God is present.

“The goal of this lesson is to understand why grief exists, why it appears in different seasons of life, and how God meets us in every kind of loss as we continue learning to live with God and grief.”

Most Recognized Source of Grief: Loss of a loved one

The loss of a loved one is the most recognized source of grief. When someone we love dies, their absence creates a real void, and grief is what happens inside us in response. As we learned in Lesson 1, the presence of grief does not mean the absence of God. God remains present as we learn to live with loss.

Research on grief consistently shows that there is no single timeline for grieving the loss of a loved one. It is common for grief to resurface at meaningful times, such as anniversaries, holidays, family milestones, or ordinary moments that bring the person to mind. Remembering someone we love is healthy and important, but those memories can also remind us of the loss. This does not mean grief is getting worse or that healing has failed. It reflects the lasting impact of love and relationships, even as life moves forward.

Returning to work, church, and daily responsibilities often reflects strength and necessity, not the end of grieving. Many people learn to live well and function faithfully while grief continues to surface at times. Over time, the intensity of grief often changes, but the meaning of the relationship remains. This pattern is well documented in grief research and observed regularly by counselors who work with loss.

Grief does not disappear with time. You loved them, and you still grieve their loss. There will be moments when you feel the loss more strongly. This does not mean something is wrong or that healing has failed. It is a natural and normal way to live with grief.

The good news is that living with grief does not mean living without God. As we learned in our first lesson, life is not an either-or choice between God and grief. Remember our key verse: “The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart” (Psalm 34:18). This assures us that God is close, especially when grief feels the strongest.

This is where we apply what we learned in Lesson 1. Even while living with grief, we still have choices. We can either focus on God or focus on grief. We can either be grateful for God’s presence in our grief, or blame God for our grief. We can either draw strength from God, or remain stuck in grief. Living with God and grief means choosing, again and again, to turn toward God while we live with the reality of loss.

How to Focus on God While Living With Grief

When grief is present, we have the option to focus on God, not on our grief. This means being intentional to believe God is present and able to comfort us.

When we lose a loved one, grief—the internal response to loss—often shows up through repeated thoughts about their absence and the change in our life without them. Counselors consistently observe that when these thoughts stay centered only on what has changed or been lost, the mind tends to replay the same memories, questions, and regrets.

Grief research shows that this repeated mental focus increases emotional exhaustion, disrupts sleep, affects concentration, and drains energy over time. Remembering the person we love is not the problem. The strain comes when grief remains as our focus.

The good news is that we are not stuck focusing on grief. We can choose to focus on God, and here’s how.

Focusing on God begins by recognizing God’s presence alongside our grief. Remember our key verse: “The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart” (Psalm 34:18). Grief can make us feel alone, but this verse assures us that we are not. When grief brings the loss to mind, we intentionally remind ourselves God is near right now.

This does not mean we stop thinking about our loved one. It means we do not allow grief to lie to us about God’s presence or our ability to move forward after loss. The loss is real and painful, and God’s presence is also real and comforting. Holding both together is what it looks like to focus on God while living with grief.

God, who is close to us in our grief, has already given us instructions to help us navigate life with God and grief. He tells us in Psalm 55:22, “Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee.” Casting our burden means we bring our grief to God instead of keeping it only inside us. We talk to God about what we are feeling, what hurts, what we miss, and what we fear. This may be done out loud, quietly in prayer, or by writing these thoughts down and offering them to God.

Counselors consistently observe that naming thoughts and emotions instead of suppressing them helps reduce emotional strain and prevents grief from becoming overwhelming. What God instructs us to do aligns with how He created us. Expressing grief brings clarity and steadiness over time. Bringing that grief to God brings it to the One who knows us, loves us, and is near to us.

When thoughts and emotions stay trapped inside, grief often feels heavier. Bringing those thoughts and feelings to God is even more meaningful. He is near, He cares for us, and He knows how He created us. When we talk to God about what we are feeling, we are bringing our grief to the One who loves us and is able to help us.

How to be Grateful for God, not Blame God for the Loss:

Gratitude for God in grief means acknowledging what God already gave before the loss ever came. At some point in life, many of us thanked God for the people He placed in our lives. We thanked Him for a spouse, a child, a parent, a sibling, a friend. Scripture reminds us that every good gift comes from God. “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father” (James 1:17). The life we shared with the person we lost was a gift from God.

Grief can slowly shift our focus. When loss becomes the center of our thoughts, it is easy to begin blaming God for what happened. Questions arise like, Why did God take them? This way of thinking treats God as if He personally caused the loss. Scripture is clear that death did not come from God’s design. “By one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin” (Romans 5:12). Death is the result of sin in a fallen world, not God reaching into our lives to take someone away.

Living with God and grief means remembering what the Bible teaches about loss and death. God Himself knows loss. Sin separated humanity from Him, and those who die without salvation remain lost forever. Yet God did not respond to loss by withdrawing. He responded by giving. “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son” (John 3:16). God entered suffering so that death would not have the final word. Scripture also promises that death will one day end. “The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death” (1 Corinthians 15:26).

Choosing gratitude in grief means thanking God for the life we were given with the person we lost. It means acknowledging that the memories, the years, and the love shared were real gifts. It also means recognizing that God was present then, and He is present now. Remember our key verse: “The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart” (Psalm 34:18).

Clinical grief research supports this pattern. Counselors consistently observe that people who are helped to remember meaning, connection, and gratitude alongside loss show greater emotional stability over time than those who remain focused only on the moment of loss. Gratitude does not remove grief, but it helps prevent grief from turning into bitterness or blame.

Gratitude keeps grief from reshaping who God is in our minds. It allows us to mourn honestly while still recognizing God’s goodness, God’s faithfulness, and God’s promise that death will not always be part of our story.

This is how we choose gratitude for God’s presence in grief, instead of allowing grief to redefine our view of God.

Action Steps for Living with God & Grief:

Acknowledge weakness instead of ignoring it

Grief affects more than emotions. Over time, it drains energy, focus, and inner strength. Counselors consistently observe that people become worn down when grief continues alongside daily responsibilities, even when they are doing their best to keep going.

Instead of ignoring that weakness or pushing through it, God teaches us what to do in Psalm 73:26: “My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart.” When grief leaves us tired, distracted, or worn down, we bring that weakness to God. We acknowledge that we do not have the strength we once had and ask Him to supply what we lack.

Just as we bring our emotions to God, we also bring our weakness to Him. Drawing strength from God allows us to keep living while grief is present. God becomes the source of strength when our own strength is limited. This is how we continue living with God and grief together.

Learn to Talk it Over with God

After losing a loved one, one area people grieve is the loss of that person’s voice in their life. They miss talking through decisions, hearing their advice, or getting their perspective. Making decisions without that person is hard and sometimes scary. This is a normal part of grief.

The good news is, God addresses this need in Proverbs 3:5–6: “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

This means that God has always been the One giving wisdom. At times, He used the person we lost as part of that guidance. Their absence does not mean God’s guidance has ended. We have not lost the source of wisdom. God is still leading us, and as we seek Him, He can and often does use others to help guide us as we

Receive strength one day at a time

Living with God and grief means choosing to go to God each day for strength. This is a choice we make on purpose.

God teaches us this in Deuteronomy 33:25, “As thy days, so shall thy strength be.” God gives strength for the day we are living. Each day, we go to Him for what we need today.

Practically, this begins by telling God we need His help. We speak to Him honestly. We ask for strength. We ask for clarity. We ask for help to get through the day. This can be done quietly, out loud, or in prayer.

God also teaches this in Matthew 6:34: “Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”

Jesus is telling us to deal with today and let tomorrow come when it comes. Grief can make our minds run ahead, wondering how we will keep going. This verse brings us back to the day we are living. God gives help for today, and we go to Him for today’s strength.

Closing Review:

This lesson has shown us how to live with God while living with grief. We learned that grief is a real and lasting response to loss, and that it continues to affect our thoughts, emotions, and daily life. We learned that grief does not follow a schedule, and that its presence does not mean God is absent. We were reminded that even while living with grief, we still have choices. We can choose where we place our focus. We can choose gratitude instead of blame. We can choose to rely on God for strength, guidance, and help each day.

Most importantly, we learned that God does not leave us without support. He invites us to bring our grief to Him, to speak honestly, to depend on Him for direction, and to receive strength one day at a time. Living with God and grief means continuing to walk forward with loss present, while trusting that God remains near, involved, and faithful to help us as we do.